THE SEVEN STAGES OF AK
Psychologists often refer to the 7 stages of grief that accompany any significant loss in an individual's life. We certainly think AK qualifies, and know the stages all too well:
1) DENIAL: "There's no way I could've missed the flop. They were suited. I can call here, I probably still have the best hand. Shoot, I should raise to narrow the field"
2) ANGER: "I raised preflop. The board is 239. What the fuck are they calling on? Oh, now they're re-raising me? Well, we'll f***ing see about that. Fine, your 23o hit? Congrat-u-f***ing-lations. Cap!"
3) GUILT: "Man, I missed the turn and they're still betting into me. I am such a terrible player. I should really let go of this hand. Let go if it, dumbass. Let go. See, this is why you never make money at poker because you can't lay a hand down you stupid fuck JUST FOLD."
4) DEPRESSION: "Call"
5) FORGIVENESS: "It's ok, you have to look that guy up every once in a while with A high. He might've been on AQ or AJ, and you would've had the best hand then. It's good for your table image anyhow. People won't mess with you now.
6) ACEPTANCE: "Ok, next time I'll just limp and see a flop."
7) RECOVERY: "Hey, AKs, alright - RAISE!"